Counsellors lead with their hearts.
"Another therapist wisely remarked to me many years ago that without the ability to truly care for each of our clients, we simply cannot do our jobs."
There are so many parts to effective counselling, including skill, knowledge, experience, aptitude, and insight. But nothing is more important than empathy, and it is something we all deserve to receive when we most require it. If you want or need to feel deeply heard and understood, attending counselling is often the means for this. If you don't leave the office feeling heard, seek out a different therapist, one who truly "gets you," because this is our job.
I find that some clients feel worried that their problems are not big, serious, or severe enough to warrant my attention and care in a therapy session. I always explain that life is relative, and if it matters to you, it matters to me. I acknowledge the trending concept of "first world problems," whereby we in the Western-world express concerns which may truly pale in comparison to the suffering of people in other parts of the world. And sometimes perspective-taking is useful. Yet it is unfair to deny ourselves or someone else compassion for what hurts. Any problem is welcome and fair to bring into my office.
Clients also often express that talking to a counsellor feels much different than speaking to even the most empathetic friend, because they don't need to feel like a burden, or like they are being selfish always talking about themselves. Counsellors who work one-to-one value nothing more than to focus entirely on you, often being able to empathize even with things you are embarrassed or ashamed of.
Please know you are welcome here just as you are, with all of the thoughts and feelings that make you unique.
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